To be honest with you

We have all heard the old adage, "Honesty is the best policy." But what exactly is honesty? Is honesty the same as truthfulness? When you think of honesty you are weighing an emotional response to what is happening for you. It is what you actually care about. It reflects your values. When you are being truthful you are more likely communicating the facts as you know them. What the other person is saying or doing strikes a chord in you. Your response may be framed in either a negative or a positive way. You may be sharing how the observed behavior affects the other person or the people or situation around them. How do you decide what it is that you share? First, it is important that there be mutual trust. It is also important to have a clear picture of what the behavior looks like. Finally, how willing are you to provide those elements of truth knowing it might have a negative impact on the relationship? How has it felt for you to be on the receiving end of honesty, and how did you change as a result of it?