Love is not pain free

Feeling true love does not necessarily put you into an "and they lived happily ever after" mode. When we choose to form the emotional bond of love with another, we open ourselves to vulnerability. There may be disappointment, betrayal, worry, or loss attached to feeling love. None of the connections that we make come with a guarantee that you will not experience some pain surrounding it. I know of people who are anticipating or have recently experienced the passing of a parent or a pet. Their grief is genuine, profound, and almost inconsolable at this moment. They wonder if their lives will ever return to normal following this event. Life will never be what it was before; they will adjust to the change hopefully with warm memories of the one who passed. The same is true when a loving relationship ends. You can survive the pain by embracing it. It is only when you attempt to deny or avoid it through unhealthy means such as engaging in addictive behavior that you prolong it. It is important that you reach out to others when you are in pain. I found this to be especially helpful when my mother died. I knew that I was not alone and that others shared their hope that there was life beyond her death. Pain over the loss of a loved one is part of the human condition. Where are you in this process today?